Never Let Go
by BlackBeauty613
Summary: Promise me you'll never leave." she whispered. "As long as you promise never to let me go." I replied. I'm sorry I let go of you. Songfic, info inside. Rypay friendship.


**This is an old, old story that I wrote a few months ago. I had it up, then deleted it, and now I want it back up again, soo...here it is!**

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...Ryan's POV...

**FLASHBACK (7 YEARS)**

"_Don't fall Sharpay!" I shouted playfully at my twin sister. We were both at the local park and presently, we were hanging on the monkey bars, trying to see who could hold on the longest. So far, we've been hanging on for 10 minutes, passing the time by talking and laughing with each other. That's pretty good for 11 year old kids._

"_Alright Ryan! You know I'm gonna beat you!" Sharpay shrieked. I smiled and laughed at her persistence. Our parents were fighting again and we decided to get away for a while. We were, however, just eleven years old. We couldn't handle it._

"_Ugh!" Sharpay groaned "My hands are slipping!"_

"_So are mine! I don't think I can-"_

**And we both go down together  
We'd stay there forever  
Just try to get up**

_And down we went together. We screamed and landed with a thump on our butts. We sat there for a few seconds, staring at each other before breaking out into uncontrollable laughs. We laughed for what seemed like hours with each other, trying to get to our feet. But the laughs prevented that. We were down for what seemed like forever. Finally, I got to my feet. I held out my hand for Sharpay and she took it, hoisting herself up and still laughing. She collapsed into my arms and laughed until her face turned blue. I started laughing again, but this time it was because she was. I couldn't help it. She just looked so weird laughing at nothing important. But we were kids. Just naïve, little kids._

"_You okay?" I asked her through laughs. By now she was crying. But she nodded all the same. I smiled and replied "Okay. Do you think we should be getting home?"_

_Her face suddenly darkened and she shook her head, afraid. I stroked her hair and comforted "Hey don't worry. I'll be right there."_

_She looked in the direction of our house and, still skeptical, nodded slowly. I nodded also and kissed her hair, not saying anything else. We walked back to our house, sure that there was going to be another fight tonight, but we didn't care that much. We had each other to turn to._

"_Ryan?" Sharpay asked me suddenly._

"_Yeah?" I replied._

_She stopped. I looked at her, confused. She smiled weakly and, starting to tear, whispered "Promise me you'll never leave."_

_I froze. How could she ever think that?_

_I smiled and touched her hand lightly. "As long as you promise to never let me go." I replied. _

_She sent me a watery smile and wrapped her arms around my waist. I returned the hug and closed my eyes. I would never leave her._

_And I know that she would never let me go._

**END FLASHBACK**

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. That was 7 years ago. Back when I actually believed in promises. When we finished high school, she expected me to go to the same collage as her. I wanted to, but I couldn't. I had already been accepted by another school. I wasn't accepted to Sharpay's school, but I was to the other one. Sharpay would be in Pennsylvania...

While I stayed in California.

**And I'm sorry  
This wasn't easy  
When I asked you, believe me  
And never let go  
**

**FLASHBACK (2 MONTHS AGO)**

I sat on Sharpay's bed, staring at the floor. I had just gotten my collage letters and I was absolutely devastated. How was I ever going to explain this to Sharpay? We made a promise to each other.

"Ryan? What are you doing here?" My head snapped up. There stood an 18 year old Sharpay Evans, confusion coating her face. I smiled weakly and, trying to block out my tears, tried "Sharpay, we... we need to talk."

"About what?" Sharpay asked, sitting on her bed beside me.

I took a deep breath. I didn't want to be the one to break out lifelong promise, but it had to be done. Somehow.

**Well I'm thinking of the worst things  
That I could say to you**

How was I going to tell her this? All sorts of thoughts ran through my mind like "We're probably not going to see each other for 4 years, so we'll probably lose contact." And "We'll be on the other side of the country for God knows how long. We'll be like strangers the next time we say each other."

God, this is so hard! I don't even want to look at her reaction. I can't stand to hear her voice. Pain. All over. This couldn't be more painful.

"Uhh... I don't exactly know how to say this, but..." I tried to say something, but it all came out in one big word. "I'mgoingtoCaliforniawhileyougotoPennState!"

I broke my gaze from the floor and looked at her face, expecting to see tears streaming down her face. But instead, she wore a confused look. "What was that?" she asked me.

I took a deep, shaky breath and slowly whispered "I'm... going to... California while... you go... to... P-Penn State."

This time, I kept my eyes on the carpet as though it was the most fascinating thing in the world. I just couldn't bear to see her face.

I decided that it was time to face reality. I slowly lifted my head and as soon as I did, I almost burst into tears. Sharpay sat there, pale and frozen, eyes bloodshot and dry, and her mouth halfway open. She was staring into my eyes and saw right through me. She knew that this wasn't just a joke.

**But a promise doesn't mean a thing anymore  
And this never will be right with me  
And now you're trying to desperately  
But I'm tongue tied and terrified of what I'll say  
**

"You promised." She finally whispered, almost inaudible. I opened my mouth speak, but I couldn't find the right words to say. I was so afraid I would say the wrong thing. I could tell that you were trying to desperately believe that it wasn't true.

"Sharpay I'm sorry. I don't want this to happen either, but you know that I can't do anything about it now. It'll never be right to me, but we have to deal with it." I said, starting to feel my eyes bulge from the tears I refused to let fall.

"You can't do this to me." Sharpay seethed weakly in between her silent sobs. I closed my eyes and went to touch her hand like I always do when some drama occurs, but she pulled away viciously. I tried "Sharpay I'm sorry. But I promise that-"

"No," She whispered to me lowly, starting to stand up and walk to the door. "Don't promise me anything. You made one simple one that you would never leave me and you broke it."

"Shar, you can't give up on your own brother! Please, I promise that I'll call you everyday! Just give me one more chance to try to make this work! I promise you that we'll be okay!" I grabbed her arm to stop her from leaving, but she slapped my hand away. I stared into her eyes, which were filled with tears and messy from the running eyeliner and mascara. I could barely stand it.

"I don't believe in promises anymore Ryan. They don't mean anything anymore." With that, she turned and walked out the door, leaving me forever. I couldn't hold them in anymore. I walked over to the corner, slid down to the very back, and cried my eyes out. We were done. Over. Saying goodbye forever.

**And then we both go down together  
We may stay there forever  
I'll just try to get up  
And I'm sorry  
This wasn't easy  
When I asked you, believe me  
You never let go...**

**But I let go  
**  
...2 Years Later...

I woke up in a cold sweat. I was now in collage. 10,000 miles away from my sister. She never talked to me after I told her about California, just as I expected. I tried calling her more than 200 times, but she never picked up or returned my calls. I was now living with my new girlfriend, Christina.

"Ryan? Sweetie, what's wrong? Did you have another nightmare about Sharpay?" Christina asked, waking up.

I sighed, but nodded. "I dreamed that she died. The last think I said to her was 'I promise that we'll die together.' I walked out for a second and some guy comes over and blows the place up. Why do I keep breaking promises to people?"

Christina sat up from her spot right beside me and rubbed my bare back. "Maybe because you're psyching yourself out. You broke one promise to someone and now you think that you can't keep any other ones."

I replied "Yeah, but this wasn't just any promise. I promised that I would never leave her. If I can't keep a promise that big, I can't keep any at all. God, why was I so stupid? We tried to get into a collage together, but I didn't plan it well enough. It's my fault."

Christina shook her head and answered "Listen to yourself. You at least tried. Doesn't that count for something?"

I sighed "Yeah I guess. This all just gives me one big headache."

Christina laughed and flirted "Well, why don't we go back to sleep and talk about this in the morning?"

I smiled "Yeah. Sorry that I woke you up."

Christina just shrugged. She leaned over and kissed my lips before saying "Goodnight. I love you."

"Love you too." I replied, placing myself under the covers again. I closed my eyes, afraid to go to sleep. If I saw her hurt again, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself. Even if it is just a dream.

----

The next day at school was the due date of our projects. We were assigned to write and sing songs of that were completely made up by us, no help by other artists at all.

**I could only sing you sad songs  
And you could sing along  
And you could see the melody  
That's been calling out your wrongs  
**

While everyone else sang songs of happiness and merriment, I couldn't bring myself to do the same. There was too much sorrow in my life to lie to my classmates and teacher. It was impossible. So instead, I wrote a song called Apologize. It's written from Sharpay's point of view. She hasn't been returning my calls because she's telling me that it's too late to apologize.

I sat down at the piano and waited for the class to end their applause. I looked out and saw Christina smile at me and give me a thumbs up. I returned her smile and started playing the notes, accompanied by the violin. When my cue came, I started singing...

"_I'm holdin' on your rope  
Got me ten feet off the ground  
And I'm hearin' what you say  
But I just can't make a sound  
You tell me that you need me  
Then you go and cut me down  
But wait  
You tell me that you're sorry  
Didn't think I'd turn around  
And say_

__

That it's too late to apologize  
It's too late  
I said it's too late to apologize  
It's too late  
Yeah

_I'd take another chance  
Take a fall, take a shot f-_"

I couldn't go on. I froze, as did the violinist, and stared at the keys. Professor Millbrand asked "Mr. Evans? Please go on."

I ignored him. I grabbed my stuff and sped to the door, shouting back "I'm sorry. I can't do this."

I could hear him shout "Mr. Evans! Come back here!" but I didn't listen. I just kept running and running until I reached me and Christina's room. I opened the door with my key and gathered my things. Just as I was about to write a goodbye note to Christina, I felt a hand grab my arm. Christina said loudly "What's going on?! Where are you going?!"

I quickly answered "Chris, I'm sorry. I can't stay here. I have to see her. I love you and I'll call you in a few days."

**And this never will be right with me  
And now you're trying to desperately  
But I'm tongue tied and terrified of what I'll say  
But I never told you everything  
I'm losing hope and fading dreams  
And every single memory along the way  
**  
I could hear her shouting behind me, but I didn't care. I hopped into my car and drove off to the airport, not regretting the F that I was going to get on my assignment. No one would understand why I did what I did. They didn't write a song that was from someone else's point of view that hurt to the point you broke down after just reading that title. I couldn't bear to finish it. I wouldn't share my life with everyone else. I wouldn't do it.

When I finally reached the airport, I got my stuff and walked up to the front desk. "How much is a one way ticket to Pennsylvania?"

----

I stared at the door, my body numb. I couldn't believe what I was doing. I was finally getting my life back together. Nothing could stop me now, except for myself. I was about to turn around and believe that I was making a huge mistake, but I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

"One second!"

I melted at her voice. She sounded so much more mature. Oh God, how was I gonna say this? "Hey Shar! I'm sorry for breaking the promise that ruined both of our lives! Wanna go get some pizza?" Yeah right.

I was snapped out of my thoughts by the door opening and after that, silence. She was beautiful. Her long, blonde hair had grown longer and she looked more mature and sophisticated. She was dressed in a silver sparkly dress that reached her knees along with silver heels with diamonds. She was wearing eyeliner and red lipstick, giving her that "Christina Aguilera" look, only with longer hair. She had a date, I could tell. She never wore that dress unless she was on a first date with someone.

"What do you want?" Sharpay seethed lowly. I could tell that I just ruined her day. She could barely look me in the eye.

I didn't reply. I just slowly walked to her and drowned her in my arms. I expected her to

push me off, but to my surprise, she broke down into uncontrollable sobs, she squeezed me tightly.

I whispered words of comfort in her ear and slowly sang...

"**And then we both go down together  
We may stay there forever  
I'll just try to get up  
And I'm sorry  
This wasn't easy  
When I asked you, believe me  
You never let go  
But I let go**"**  
**  
"I'm sorry Ryan," Sharpay started "I should've been more understanding. It was just a promise."

I shook my head "No. You were right. The word 'promise' shouldn't just be thrown around like that. If you say it, you have to keep it, no matter what. I should've known that. I'm sorry. You shouldn't forgive me."

Between sobs, she protested "I was overreacting. You weren't accepted and I should've dealt with that. It's just that we've never been separated like this before and I couldn't handle the first time. Whenever we had a big trip to go to another state, we went together. The farthest apart we were was when I had sleepovers at a friend's house. I was just surprised that I wouldn't see you for years. I'm sorry Ryan. You're the one who shouldn't be forgiving me."

I shook my head and pulled her closer to me, if that was possible. "How about we just forgive each other and act like this never happened?"

I felt her nod against my chest and mutter "Promise?"

I hesitated. Did she actually believe in promises again?

I smiled and kissed her hair, answering "I promise. I promise forever."

**And we both go down together  
And stay there forever  
Just try to get up**

**And then we both go down together  
We may stay there forever  
I'll just try to get up  
And I'm sorry  
This wasn't easy  
When I asked you, believe me  
You never let go  
But I let go...**

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**You ready for the long ass title of this song?**

**I'd Hate to Be You When People Find Out What This Song is About - Mayday Parade**

**What a mouthful...**

**REVIEW!!! Thnx :)**

**~Rachel :)**


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